Pleasure Mechanics

When you get aroused, where do you feel it? What parts of your body light up with sensation and energy when you climax?

For most people, the genitals are the focus of both arousal and orgasm. We feel sensation where we are being stimulated and where we are paying attention. Most of us choose to focus primarily (or exclusively) on the genitals during sex.

We have been culturally trained to narrow this focus on the genitals, to be as sure as possible we will reach climax. There is a scarcity mentality around orgasm - a goal-oriented way of thinking that makes us desperate to have an orgasm when we can, just in case another opportunity doesn't come around soon enough.

By paying attention only to genital sensation, we develop a pattern of "balloon sex" - we squeeze all of our sensation and focus into a small part of our body, blowing it up until it pops.

Often, the whole body tenses up to concentrate sensation - our legs go stiff, our back and arms contract, our faces sometimes even tense up as we approach orgasm. We try and squeeze every last drop of sensation out of our genitals as we can. There is nothing intrinsically wrong with this approach - it can lead to very strong genital sensations and orgasms. It does, however, limit the amount of sensation you can feel in the rest of your body.

Alternatively, you can build up arousal, and consciously relax your body, breathing deeply, and allow erotic sensations to flow through the entire body.  Using full body touch while simultaneously stimulating the genitals (remember, between you and your partner you have four hands available for stimulation!) can increase the full-body sensation. Some people report that using this technique they feel orgasmic sensation stream through their entire body - they shudder and shake, feel vibrations of pleasure from head to toe.

Have you ever experienced what you would call a "full body orgasm?" Tell us about it! What techniques helped get you there?