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Fantasy Vs. Desire

Fantasies and Desires are two very different categories, and it is essential to make a clear distinction so you can freely Explore Your Fantasies & Name Your Desires

Just like we can enjoy action movies without any real desire to be in an exploding building, the realm of sexual fantasy is where anything is possible and we are free to explore. Meanwhile, your Desires are what you actually want more of in real life!

Fantasy Vs. Desire

Fantasy: the faculty or activity of imagining things, esp. things that are impossible or improbable.

Desire: a strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen.

Something changes from a fantasy to a desire as soon as you want to make it real. Pleasures may change from one category to the other over your lifetime.

Explore Your Fantasies, Name Your Desires

Here are some of our interactive resources to help you explore your fantasies and name your specific desires so you can get more of what you want! Ready for more? Join The Pleasure Pod & Unlock Members Only Resources

  • Questions & Conversation Starters About Fantasy Vs. Desire
  • Name Your Desires: Fill In The Blanks Worksheet

More On Fantasy Vs. Desire

Fantasy is the world of pure erotic imagination. The human body responds to erotic thoughts the same way it responds to erotic stimulation from outside. So the power of fantasy can be used to name your specific desires, tap into more arousal and discover the patterns of your turn-on.

Some people fantasize about past sexual experiences, remembering peak erotic experiences. 

Other fantasies center on who we wish we could be, or might have been, projecting an idealized self into an idealized world. 

Other fantasies are about what we would like to experience if anything was possible and there were no real world limitations where mythical creatures and supernatural beings with powers can transport us beyond the daily grind.

Fantasy can run the gamut from simple pleasures to elaborate scenarios, can be mild or wild, based on experiences we want to have or those we would never even consider enacting. Fantasy is just that – the magical place in your mind where everything and anything is possible.

Noticing the fabric of your fantasies can give you important information about your own arousal. You can choose to make some of your fantasies come true, or leave them as fantasy only pleasures, private worlds of pleasure in your mind.

Spermatorrhea

In the 18th and 19th centuries, masturbation was considered to be the source of a laundry list of pathologies, from insanity to hair loss. Onanism, or “spilling the seed” by ejaculating outside of intercourse intended for procreation, was a sin and medical danger.

If a patient had ejaculations outside of marital intercourse, or released more semen than is typical, then he was diagnosed with a disease called spermatorrhea or “seminal weakness.” A variety of drugs (including sedation) and other severe treatments, including circumcision and castration, were advised as treatment.

This is an image of a “German Spermatorrhoea Ring,” circa 1894.  Boys were fitted with these rings, or other elaborate devices, to prevent nocturnal erections and masturbation. If the penis got erect, the sharp teeth would puncture the shaft of the penis, causing great pain and potential injury.

Women were not spared brutal medical treatment for masturbation: cauterization of the clitoris was common medical practice.

Happily, the medical field has come a long way in the past century and doctors now heartily recommend regular masturbation for both male and female sexual health. Cock rings can be left for folks to explore on a more voluntary and pleasurable basis.

 

 

Vaginal wetness is not equal to female arousal.

There is of course an overlap, those times when a woman is both aroused and wet.

And yet. . .

A woman can be highly aroused and not at all wet.

Or very wet and not at all aroused!

Lubricants are always an option to increase wetness, which, in turn, may heighten arousal.

 

https://www.pleasuremechanics.com/wetness-and-arousal/

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