What Could Make This Even Better?
In the first stages of learning any new sexual skill together, you will learn new ways to verbally communicate what works and what doesn’t. Being able to say “That feels great, but it would feel even better with a little more pressure” will make the difference between a good experience and a great one. Likewise, when you are new to giving prostate massage, it is essential to begin asking questions like “Will you tell me when this feels just right?” or “Would you like me to go deeper or is this good?”
After you make love, in the hours after or even the next day, you can ask “What were your favorite parts?” or “What could have made it even better?” Communicating about your preferences and desires is not clinical or cold – it is a high expression of love and concern, showing you care enough about your partner to strive for ever more pleasurable touch.
Asking these practical questions begins the conversation about physical desires. The translation to the bedroom can be seamless – you can learn to ask questions such as “Would more pressure on your clitoris feel better?” or “Would you mind touching my thighs more? I especially love light touch on the inside of my thighs”
This communication doesn’t have to happen during massage or during sex – often these conversations are more useful out of the bedroom. After every massage, you can ask “What were your favorite parts? What could have made it even better?” Communicating about your preferences and desires is not clinical or cold – it is a high expression of love and concern, showing you care enough about your partner to strive for ever more pleasurable touch.
Non-Verbal Erotic Communication
We communicate not just with our words, but with our bodies, sounds, touch, gestures. How close you sit on the couch together is a strong communication. Sharing massage and touch is like learning a new language together – it doubles your ability to speak to one another. A simple loving touch can communicate caring, support and compassion. Bringing more attention to your hands and bodies will make clear the areas that you succesfully communicate your love and other areas where you may need to evaluate what you are saying to one another with your physical actions.