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Just The Tip: Exhibitionism and Voyeurism

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Exhibitionism and Voyeurism

In this episode we share an excerpt from Carol Queen’s Real Live Nude Girl: Chronicles of Sex Positive Culture and discuss the erotic thrills of exhibitionsim and voyeurism.

We cover:

The erotic power in both being looked at and looking at someone else with pure erotic abandon.
How voyeurism has been problematized because it is often done with predatory, non consensual energy. The kind we are talking about is purely consensual and extremely hot!
How you can play with exhibitionism and voyeurism in your relationship or out in the world.
Why exhibitionism doesn’t have to be going as extreme as going to a sex party. We share simple ways to get started.
How to practice Benevolent Voyeurism.

Your Challenge: Practice both seeing and being seen out in the world. Notice what it brings up and see if you can find the erotic thrill in both exhibitionism and voyeurism!

Welcome!

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Welcome To The Pleasure Mechanics Newsletter! We’re looking forward to sharing our best techniques and proven strategies with you so you can unleash way more pleasure in your life!

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Thanks again for joining up, and remember we are always here for you. Email us anytime!

Start exploring now: The Speaking of Sex Podcast, The Sex Index or our Online Courses

Naughty Sex For Grown Ups

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Naughty Sex For Grown Ups

Isn’t it fun to feel a little naughty? Ever since we were kids, being a bit naughty has been so thrilling. Bending the rules, sneaking a treat, testing boundaries and breaking taboos are surefire ways to create a thrill.

Erotic taboos can be a tremendous source of arousal. But they also create shame, and shame creates silence. In that silence, people can get hurt. So how do we relieve ourselves from crippling shame while preserving the thrills of breaking taboos?

In this week’s podcast, we explore the art of releasing shame and mastering technique while enjoying the thrill of breaking taboos. Make sure to tune in if any part of you enjoys being a little naughty once in awhile!

One of our favorite sexologists, the late and great Jack Morin, recognized the erotic importance of taboos. He even names “violating prohibitions” as one of the four cornerstones of eroticism. He states: “A fusion of arousal and rule-breaking when you’re young dramatically increases the odds that you’ll retain in your adult eroticism a tendency to be excited by violational behaviors and fantasies. I call the aphrodisiac effects of violating prohibitions “the naughtiness factor”

The essential step is to release shame so you truly believe in your heart that your actions are good for you and healthy. Then you can roleplay as much naughtiness as you wish.

Let’s admit it: we all like being a bit naughty once in awhile. We believe you can slay shame and still get the thrills of the naughtiness factor. You can be as naughty as you want to be and still feel great about yourself!

Erotic Massage

What Is Erotic Massage?

Erotic massage is a complete sexual experience that both men and women can enjoy. Erotic massage can create extremely high levels of arousal and often ends with powerful full body orgasms. The key to erotic massage is combining full body touch with arousing erotic touch.

Erotic massage is a “taking turns” erotic experience. One of you is in the role of Giver, the other gets to relax and focus entirely on being the Receiver.
Erotic massage is an opportunity to lavish your lover with erotic touch, head to toe. It is a very luxurious experience, and many people report reaching higher levels of arousal than they knew possible.

Just like oral sex, the experience of “taking turns” allows you to sink deeper into the experience of both giving and receiving. While receiving erotic massage, there is nothing to do but focus on the sensations in your body. Many people are surprised at just how much arousal they can handle while receiving erotic massage. Women are surprised at how much pleasure they can feel when they give themselves permission to receive the full attention of their devoted lover. Men are surprised at how long they can sustain arousal and maintain erections. When receiving erotic massage people often experience far more arousal than they new possible.

Erotic massage starts with a full body massage. This relaxes the body and primes it for full body arousal. Once the recipient is totally relaxed, you can begin building arousal with erotic stimulation. Using your hands to stimulate your lover’s genitals (and anal area if you so choose!) you build up arousal and then use more full body touch to “spread it out” into full body arousal.

When done well, erotic massage creates the experience of full body orgasm – as you climax you feel the arousal streaming through every part of your body. Many people report the sensation of arousal streaming through their legs and arms and “shooting out” the top of their heads. Don’t go into your first erotic massage experience expecting a transcendent outcome. Just like any other physical skill, it will take time to master. Instead, approach it with a spirit of curiosity and just be open to what happens!

To master the art of erotic massage, check out the Foreplay Mastery Course!

Emily Nagoski Part 2

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Emily Nagoski Interview Part 2 Last week we brought you part one of our interview with Emily Nagoski, author of the new book Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life. Listen to Part 1 here.

This week, her op-ed about responsive desire was published in the New York Times and triggered a firestorm of response. We are proud to be sharing her groundbreaking work with you again this week in part two of the interview.

This week, the interview covers:

Why sex is NOT a drive (and what it really is!)
The new definition of orgasm
How to reprogram your brain to overcome erotic obstacles

Grab your copy of Come As You Are

Check out Emily’s op-ed in The New York Times