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Mutual Masturbation

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Mutual Masturbation: How To

Mutual masturbation is not a very inspiring term, but the activity it describes can set your sex life aflame.

The term mutual masturbation can describe two different sex acts. Some people use it to describe masturbating alongside one another, while others use the term to mean stimulating your lover with your hands. Both of these activities are worth exploring for their unique thrills.

If you are bored with sex or just looking for something new to shake things up, try both forms of mutual masturbation! Let’s break both types down and discover why they are such pleasurable paths to mutual bliss.

Mutual Masturbation As Simultaneous Masturbation:

For most of us, masturbation is an intensely private activity. The idea of masturbating in front of your lover probably feels scary, and that is precisely why it can be so hot. Anytime you get vulnerable with your lover you create an erotic charge that can spike your arousal and bring you closer.

An added bonus? Masturbating in front of your lover shows them exactly how you touch yourself to reach orgasm, and they can use that knowledge when it is their turn to stimulate you.

Here are a few steps to explore mutual masturbation:

  • Masturbate alongside one another in the dark! With the lights out you won’t be so self conscious, freeing you to enjoy the charge of this new sex act. You’ll get to hear your lover’s breath and moans of pleasure. Don’t underestimate how hot this form of sex with the lights out might be!
  • When you are ready, masturbate in full sight of one another. As you touch yourself, watch your lover intently, creating a circuit of arousal without ever touching one another. Agree ahead of time that you won’t lay a finger on one another. The desire will be there, and forbidden fruit tastes all the sweeter.
  • For an added thrill, lock eyes and maintain eye contact while you orgasm. This is one of the most intimate moments you can share.
  • You can also make mutual masturbation a power play game. As your lover masturbates, give them orders. Tell them what you want to see. Forbid them to climax until you give permission. This is a great exercise in erotic communication and it can be a lot of fun to be in control of your lover’s every stroke.

Mutual Masturbation As Hand Sex:

Getting your lover off with just your hands is a thrilling, empowering and revolutionary act! This act is also called “handjobs” and “fingering” or even “erotic massage” but none of these terms come close to describing how amazing this experience can be.

Here’s the deal: your hands are one of the most dexterous, sensitive part of your body. When used to stimulate your lover, they can create sensations that you can’t create in any other way. For men, a handjob can prolong arousal and unlock male multiple orgasms. For women, direct clitoral stimulation is the key to orgasms and is an essential way to get aroused before sex. So if you haven’t mastered the art of hand sex, now is the time to get started! Here’s how:

  • Take turns! Hand sex is best when you focus on one person’s arousal at a time. One of you gets to relax and focus exclusively on getting highly aroused, while the other focuses all of their attention on creating maximum pleasure.
  • Master the skills of hand sex. There are dozens of unique ways to use your hands to stimulate your lover’s most sensitive parts. Don’t settle for a simple stroke. When you are ready, check out our Foreplay Mastery Course and get all the tools you need to master this skill in the privacy of your own home, at your own pace.
  • Expand Your Erotic Repertoire. Hand sex can be an amazing part of foreplay, but it can also be a sexual event on it’s own. If one of you isn’t in the mood for full on sex, explore mutual masturbation as a great alternative to intercourse. You’ll both end up saying “yes” way more often, which will allow your sex life to flourish over time.

Mutual masturbation is a dull name for two great sex acts. Don’t let the name stand in your way! Explore both versions of mutual masturbation, and your sexual horizons will be expanded.

ATM Sex: Your Questions Answered

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ATM Sex: Your Questions Answered

 

We recently received an email about ATM sex as depicted in porn. Here is the question we received:

i am curious how in porn you see a girl  having anal and then he pulls it out and she gives him head. this can not taste good?! is there some prepping that they do like flavored enemas?  thank you for your time, Norma

There are many questions about ATM sex. In this podcast episode, we answer all your questions and get real about ATM sex and other extreme sex acts you see in porn.

What is ATM Sex?

ATM sex stands for “ass to mouth sex” meaning switching from anal sex to oral sex.

Anal in porn was once specialty niche. Now, it is common. Porn is constantly pushing the edges of extreme to compete in crowded marketplace. ATM sex is just one way porn is pushing the edge of what is depicted as common.

The problem is, porn is fantasy. But unlike Hollywood, porn has no stunt actors or special effects, so they are using real bodies to do dangerous things. There is also no education about what is safe to do at home and what should be left to the fantasy world of porn. In short, porn is NOT a model of what you should be doing at home.

Is ATM Sex safe?

ATM sex is a high risk sexual activity. You can easily spread parasites and bacteria with ATM sex. If you really want to do this sex act, use a condom for anal, take it off and use a fresh condom for oral sex. Even then, there is still a risk of infection because condoms don’t cover everything.

Switching from anal to vaginal sex is also dangerous. Again, the spread of bacteria from one to the other is not safe. Use new condoms every time you switch orifices.

For most people ATM sex is going to remain a fantasy. If you do want to try it out, make sure to do so safely!

How To Surrender Into Orgasm

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How To Surrender Into Orgasm: Free Podcast Episode

We hear from a lot of women who have trouble reaching orgasm, either alone or with a partner. Many of these women can build lots of arousal but never quite achieve orgasm. What’s the secret? Learning how to focus on pleasurable sensation while relaxing and then surrendering into orgasm. Easier said than done, so in this podcast episode (hit the play button above to listen for free!) we give strategic advice for learning how to surrender into orgasm.

This podcast features a passage from the book The Multi-Orgasmic Woman.

Co-written by Mantak Chia, the leading expert in the field of Taoist sexuality, and Rachel Carlton Abrams, M.D., a family practice physician specializing in women’s health and sexuality, The Multi-Orgasmic Woman combines ancient Taoist practices with current sexual information. It offers a complex system of both physical practices and energy work to create more vitality in the female sexual system.

They propose a five step path to orgasm. The first four steps are focusing your intention, strengthening your pelvic muscles, kindling your sexual energy and exploring your pleasure anatomy. This week we focus on the fifth step, surrendering into orgasm.

Check out the complete book The Multi-Orgasmic Woman

Wife Spanking: Pleasure Or Punishment?

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Wife Spanking: Free Podcast

Hundreds of couples have discovered the thrills of erotic spanking with our Erotic Spanking Mastery Course. Beyond the immediate benefits of thrilling sex, many find that there are unexpected benefits to their relationship.

We recently received an email from a happy member of the Erotic Spanking Course:

Hi Ladies,

Your course on Erotic Spanking has worked wonders for my sex life. My wife loves it, she can’t seem to get it enough. Most of the time it isn’t followed by sex, she just enjoys it. One unexpected thing that came from the course is that it has changed our marriage in many ways. She used to be very argumentative and pick fights with me, now she doesn’t. She also used to challenge me on so many things; now, not so much. I’m not totally sure if the spankings are the reason behind our more peaceful home life, but it is the only recent change in our relationship that I can point to. What are your thoughts? Thanks!

Peace,

Sean

After this podcast aired, we heard back from Sean:

Hello Chris,

Thanks for answering my question. I’m glad it inspired a good discussion! My wife listened to your podcast after I did and she half jokingly said that maybe spanking actually did ‘correct’ her behavior. This of course was never the intention. (I think this goes without saying but it never hurts to add.) I definitely think there is a lot that is accurate about your comments. I appreciate how you both thoroughly made the distinction between erotic spanking and punishment. We are Christians (Catholics, actually) and we find the idea of ‘Christian’ domestic discipline so abusive.
To answer your question, I did end up speaking to my wife about how our relationship changed since I started spanking her. She has always had control issues, so if I ever took the lead on something she used to always challenge me or pick fights. It was like she couldn’t relax unless she was in control. So when I got her to let me take complete control with these spankings and she received so much pleasure from it, she began to be to be more relaxed about other aspects in our life. And over time when I started to become more confident with the spanking she started seeing me as a stronger man she can trust more with taking the lead sometimes. It allowed her be more ‘submissive’ (I’m not sure if that is the right word to describe it but it’s the first word that comes to mind). Again to reiterate: her and I are complete equals as far as I’m concerned and I certainly don’t think I has any authority over her.
Thanks again for answering my question! Have an awesome day!
Peace,
Sean

Hit the play button at the top of this page to hear our take on why erotic spanking has created marital harmony for this couple. We discuss the unexpected benefits of erotic spanking that can totally transform your life. We also talk about why some couples pick fights with one another when really what they need is more intense sex and the opportunity to dominate one another in the bedroom.

Erotic spanking may be exactly what your marriage needs! Here are our rules for Wife Spanking to make sure it strengthens your relationship and does not create marital meltdown!

Wife Spanking Rule #1: Always For Pleasure

All of the erotic techniques we offer here at Pleasure Mechanics are designed so you can have an orgasmic sex life and loving relationship. Wife spanking is no exception to this rule. Erotic spanking can be incredibly pleasurable, arousing and even romantic. It never has to hurt (even when it gets intense!) and should always leave you feeling relaxed and flooded with pleasure.

Wife Spanking Rule #2: Never For Punishment

Spanking your wife should never be a punishment or a way to control her behavior.

Do not spank your wife as punish for real world infringements. This can quickly create resent and ruin your relationship.

Do not spank without the erotic context and active consent, this is just abuse!

Wife Spanking Rule #3: Get Specific

Does your wife want to be spanked with lots of sensuality and romance? Or does she want a firm, hard spanking followed by rough sex?

Her desires may change day to day, so always ask her about what she specifically wants before you start any erotic spanking session.

Wife Spanking Rule #4: Always Warm Up

In our Erotic Spanking Mastery Course, we show you how to create a slow, steady warm up that allows the body to release endorphins. These natural pain killers allow your wife to literally get high on sensation!

With a slow warm up, she will be ready for harder spanks and they will feel intense but not painful. Each blow will create a peak of sensation and then quickly melt into delicious pleasurable release.

Wife Spanking Rule #5: Tears Can Be Cathartic

Spanking can create much needed emotional and physical catharsis (a purging release of built up tension) so if your wife tears up, don’t stop suddenly.

If you are unsure you can check in by asking “Would you like me to continue?” or say “I’m going to continue until you use your safeword. Let it all go, I love you.” With these words you are giving her permission to relax and release as you continue to spank. Many people find this kind of catharsis very cleansing.

Wife Spanking Rule #6: Being Dominant Does Not Give You Authority

Playing with power in the bedroom can be a great way to explore new erotic terrain and create thrills and excitement. But being dominant during sex does not give you authority over your wife outside of the bedroom.

Consensual erotic power play can only exist between two equal individuals. In all areas of your relationship, create balance and mutual respect. This creates the trust to enjoy power play in your sex life.

Wife Spanking Rule #7: Erotic Spanking is NOT Christian Domestic Discipline

See rules #1 through #6!

Sharing an erotic spanking experience is not the same thing as using spanking to discipline your wife, change her behavior or punish her for sins. Christian Domestic Discipline follows very different guidelines than Erotic Spanking, and the two should never be confused!

Wife Spanking Rule #8: Spanking Isn’t Just For Wives!

Men love to get spanked too! Imagine being over your wife’s knee, your body ready for her touch, quivering with anticipation. Spanking sends pleasurable vibrations through the male pelvis and straight to the penis, so many guys find it incredibly arousing. It can pair well with handjobs and other forms of sex play, so let your imagination run wild. Getting spanked doesn’t make you any less of a man – in fact you may just find it makes you feel wildly masculine and powerful!

SpankingBadge

Kink and BDSM are now mainstream topics of conversation, and more couples than ever are exploring the kinky side of life.

We know that kinky play can reinvigorate your love life, bring you new levels of satisfaction and allow you to express yourself more fully. When done with the right skills, kink can open up a vast terrain of pleasure and fun for any couple.

If you are ready to explore erotic spanking, join our Erotic Spanking Mastery Course for immediate access to everything you need to know to enjoy the thrills of spanking in your marriage. You’ll master the skills of spanking your wife while minimizing the risks. Enroll now and start your erotic adventure tonight!

 

One Path To Ecstasy

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Ecstasy is a state of total union: union of mind and body, body and spirit, spirit and universe. Sexual ecstasy is a state everyone craves, but feels far out of reach.

Here’s a way to get your body ready to access states of ecstasy (and feel really good in the process!)

Check out the full book: Maps To Ecstasy by Gabrielle Roth

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