Sex Advice — Page 11 — Pleasure Mechanics

Queening

Assume The Position: The Erotic Act of Queening

Queening

Queening is the art of facesitting, usually but not exclusively with a female on top, immersing the lucky human beneath her in the full glory of her genitals.

Some queening fans use stools or boxes especially designed for the purpose, either for comfort or for the added effect of a “throne” or the restraint of a “smothering box.”

The position of Queening allows the woman on top to control the amount of contact between her genitals and her lover’s tongue and mouth. This can be used strategically to tease, to smother, to immerse, to taunt, to tantalize.

Queening is best approached with an attitude of worship towards the woman on top. Many people who like to be “on the bottom” in this scenario simply love the full facial contact with the pussy, love feeling smothered with the weight of their lover, enjoy being out of control and submitted to the act of bringing pleasure to their lover.

It can take confidence to assume the queening position. If your partner is eager to try it out, try to trust their enthusiasm and see if you can find the pleasure in their arousal. Some women find it hard to climax while in the queening position. If this is the case, try out this position for short periods of time and then switch to a position that you can relax into as you approach orgasm.

For more on how to enjoy amazing oral sex, check out The Pleasure Mechanics Guide to Cunnilingus, included in the Foreplay Mastery Course .

This complete guide covers queening and other positions for amazing oral sex, as well as extensive techniques for giving amazing oral stimulation, communication techniques and strategies to overcome roadblocks that prevent you from enjoying the pleasures of oral sex.

Female Masturbation Techniques

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Tune in on: Spotify | RSS

Masturbation is a healthy, pleasurable part of your sex life. Whether or not you are in a relationship, making time to masturbate allows you to experience way more pleasure and unleash more powerful orgasms! Here are some thoughts on essential female masturbation techniques to get you exploring with confidence.

Masturbation is how you get to know your own body. In this episode, we first explore how to get in touch with your desires, get more aroused and learn how to have orgasms. Then, you can bring all of this knowledge to your partnered sex so you can enjoy more pleasure with your lover.

Learning new female masturbation techniques can help you discover whole new parts of your sexuality and become more in touch with how you like to be touched.

Female Masturbation Techniques: Use Your Hands

Female Masturbation Techniques Use your hands to explore your entire sexual system. Don’t rush right to your clitoris. Explore what it feels like to touch your labia, your mons and the perineum. Try lots of different kinds of stimulation to wake up new kinds of sensation. You can also zero in on the clitoris to get to orgasm – but try to experience more kinds of stimulation as you build arousal.

Many of these techniques are demonstrated in our Foreplay Mastery Course, and can be used either with a partner or as female masturbation techniques.

Essential Female Masturbation Techniques : Explore Your Sexual System

First, rest your hand on the mons and just take a few relaxed breaths.

Find the outer labia. Touch the entire outside labia, gliding one or two fingers along the length. Then, gather the flesh of the outer labia (might be quite a lot, or a small ripple of tissue) and gently pinch and roll the labia between your fingers.

Feel the texture of the lips and notice what, if any sensation, you are creating. Some people have quite a lot of erotic sensation in their outer labia – other women have very little.

Try this stroke with the inner labia as well if there is enough flesh to play with. The shape and size of the labia is different for every woman – but all have the potential of being a pleasurable part of the female sexual anatomy. Explore the area and notice what sensations you can create by stimulating the labia. Stimulating the labia is important, as it brings blood flow to the genitals and begins waking up the area without direct clitoral stimulation.

The perineum is a highly sensitive part of the female anatomy that often goes overlooked. The perineum is a nexus of nerves and an intersection of musculature. Use your thumb in small circles on the perineum. Pulse in and out, using quite deep pressure. Move one finger in small circles around the perineum.

Rest your fingers just outside the entrance to the vagina. Pause. Explore this area of the opening – there are a lot of nerve endings here and circling around the outside can be highly stimulating. Use a fingerpad and trace circles around the entrance, and trace small circles for a few moments just inside the entrance along the bottom wall, then vibrate your finger a little.

If you can reach, use your own fingers to explore your g-spot and try a range of stimulation techniques to see how much sensation you can feel inside. Try circles, long strokes, pulses and vibrations around the g-spot and see what feels best. Combine g-spot stimulation with clitoral stimulation for maximum pleasure.

Female Masturbation Techniques: Use Toys

We believe that hands are the best sexual tool ever invented! But there are lots of female masturbation techniques that can only be explored with toys. Check out our page on sex toys to get linked up to some of our favorite toys.

Smartballs are one of our favorite kinds of sex toys. These weighted balls arouse a lot of vaginal sensation, strengthen your pelvic muscles and can be a great compliment to clitoral stimulation.

You can also explore with the wide range of sex toys that are available. Like anal stimulation? Try incorporating butt plugs into your masturbation. Love your nipples played with? Put nipple clamps on and tug at them as you touch your clitoris. Your body is your own playground – explore it fully!

The more female masturbation techniques you experiment with, the more knowledge you will gain about your sexuality. Then you’ll be able to communicate with your lover and ask for exactly what you want in bed.

How To Get More Erotic Prostate Massage

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Tune in on: Spotify | RSS

A listener wants to know how to ask his reluctant wife for more prostate massage.

We share strategies for how to communicate about your desire for prostate massage, how to overcome the most common roadblocks that prevent couples from exploring prostate massage, and if all else fails, how to enjoy prostate massage as part of masturbation.

Ready to unleash the power of prostate orgasms? Check out our online course, Prostate Massage Mastery

More About Erotic Prostate Massage

Many men are hesitant to ask their partners for prostate massage. In this podcast, we talk about how to go about asking your lover for such an intimate act. We also cover the three most common roadblocks that prevent couples from enjoying prostate stimulation as part of their sex life.

Ultimately, the prostate is part of the male sexual system and it is normal, natural and healthy to want to explore this part of male sexual pleasure. So if a partner is not willing to participate, men can choose to enjoy prostate stimulation as part of their solo sex life by exploring prostate masturbation. We also discuss options for including prostate stimulation in partnered sex life using prostate toys such as the Aneros during intercourse.

Unleash the power of prostate orgasms with our complete online course, Prostate Massage Mastery

ProstatePackageGRCoverFinal

Anal Hygiene For Pleasurable Anal Sex

Anal stimulation is a healthy and pleasurable activity that can be enjoyed as part of your sex life. Anal play can range from light external anal touch to full anal sex. But as arousing as it can be, many people hold back out of concern about the hygiene of anal play.

Curious about the Pleasure Mechanics approach to anal play? Listen in to this podcast episode to hear about how you can have anal play experiences that are 100% pleasurable, 100% pain free.

Preparing For Anal Play

This article gives you all the information you need to take care of anal hygiene so you can relax and enjoy the pleasurable potential of anal play.

Many people find that using basic anal hygiene practices to prepare for anal play allows them to relax and enjoy the experience more fully.

This is simply one way to take care of yourself and your sexuality so you can enjoy the pleasures available to you.

When you are ready to master the skill of pleasurable anal stimulation and anal sex, check out our Anal Sex Mastery Online Course. All of our courses teach explicit sex skills without pornography, so you can easily master new techniques in the comfort of your own home. All Pleasure Mechanics online courses are backed by a 30 day, no questions asked guarantee – so there is nothing to lose, and so much pleasure to gain!

Anal Hygiene 101

The external anal sphincter is one of the most sensitive places on the human body. You can enjoy huge amounts of anal pleasure without any penetration.

The minimum preparation for enjoying external anal play is a regular bowel movement followed by complete external cleansing. Washing the external anal area with warm soap and water is often enough to allow you to feel at ease.

Baby wipes can also be useful to keep around for simple, quick and gentle clean-ups. The bottom line (so to speak) is keeping your intimate areas clean so you are relaxed and comfortable when you are engaging with yourself or your lover.

Prepping for anal can be as simple as this: keep it clean and freshen up! Some people like to shave, wax or otherwise remove hair around their anus. This is completely a personal preference. If you do have hair in the area, be sure to use plenty of lubricant during anal play to allow for smooth glides without pulling the hair in this sensitive area.

Latex or vinyl gloves are a great tool for anal play. With a glove on, you don’t have to worry about touching trace amounts of poop. Gloves also smooth out the edges of your fingernails. Changing gloves is easy anytime you want to switch between touching the anus and then genitals or return to full body touch. Some people find the idea of gloves clinical. Get over this association and after a few pleasurable experiences you may find yourself getting turned on at the sight of your lover pulling on a glove!

Keep It Clean!

Here is one essential anal hygiene tip: Do not touch the anus and genitals with the same hand without washing up or changing gloves!

The anus and the genitals are two distinct ecosystems and you do not want to spread bacteria from the anus to the genitals. Keep one hand reserved for anal touch, the other clean for genital touch. Our online courses demonstrate simultaneous genital and anal stimulation using two hands – this is one of the most pleasurable ways to stimulate the entire sexual system at once. Just make sure you dedicate one hand to each area, and use clean gloves anytime you want to switch it up.

Our online courses demonstrate simultaneous genital and anal stimulation using two hands – this is one of the most pleasurable ways to stimulate the entire sexual system at once. Just make sure you dedicate one hand to each area, and use clean gloves anytime you want to switch it up.

After Anal Play, Wash Your Hands!

You can use nitrile or latex gloves for quick and easy clean-up, so your hands can keep moving without a break to wash your hands. Again, practice common sense – if you use gloves, change them often and anytime you switch activities. If you don’t wear gloves, go to the bathroom and wash your hands thoroughly with soap and warm water.

Rinse Out

An internal rinse is not necessary for anal hygiene, but many people find they can relax more during anal sex after taking this step. An internal rinse can help you feel “cleaner” which for many people is a positive step towards receiving pleasurable anal touch.

Use a simple bulb enema with plain warm water to rinse out internally. Never use an enema with vinegar or other harsh ingredients. Simple bulb enemas can be found at any drugstore or ordered online. We don’t recommend using large enema bags, as they tend to cause more problems than they solve!

To use a small bulb enema, fill it with warm water (not hot!) and gently insert the tip, using lube if needed. Then squeeze the water into the rectum and immediately let it pass into the toilet. Repeat this process until the water flushes clean.

Remember, poop is not stored in the rectum, it merely passes through during an active bowel movement. So you are simply flushing out the trace amounts that may remain behind.

Lube Up for More Pleasurable Anal Play

Another essential tool for anal hygiene is lubricant*. Water-based lubricants are now readily found in every major drugstore and even many supermarkets. Silicone-based lubricants are a great choice for anal play, as they will stay slick and not dry out like water based lubricants. Use plenty of lube, reapplying when needed. External and internal anal massage can be highly arousing, without a moment of discomfort. If you experience any pain at any point in the massage, slow down or stop. There is no need to endure anything.

Preparing for anal play with basic anal hygiene practices can make this intimate exchange more pleasurable and allow you to relax deeper into the experience. Thorough cleansing prior to the sexual encounter will take your worries away, and proper anal hygiene strategies including gloves and lubricant* will make the experience more enjoyable for both you and your partner.

Arousal: The Most Essential Ingredient

Arousal is also an important part of preparing for anal play! To make anal play as pleasurable as possible for women, include lots of foreplay and arousal before touching the anus. Our Foreplay Mastery Course shows you how to stimulate her entire sexual system to create intense arousal before you use the techniques demonstrated in our Anal Sex Mastery Course.

Interested in male anal stimulation? Our Prostate Massage Mastery Course has everything you need to enjoy the intense thrills of prostate stimulation.

* please note some links on this page are affiliate links, and if you choose to make a purchase we will receive a small percentage as thanks for the referral. We only link to resources we know, trust and love!

Anal Penetration: Hygiene and Preparation

Many people are hesitant to explore anal sex out of fear of the “ick” factor. Don’t let fear of mess stop you from exploring this highly erogenous zone. Simple hygiene and preparation can make all the difference and allow you to relax as you receive anal stimulation. Being able to relax is essential to enjoy anal play, so consider preparation to be a crucial part of getting ready to enjoy this highly intimate form of touch.

If you are going to be enjoying external anal touch, read our guide to preparing for external stimulation.

If you are planning on including penetration, here is all you need to know about how to prepare for anal sex.

Ready to get started? Master the skills of anal pleasure with our online courses!

For Women: Anal Sex Mastery

For Men: Prostate Massage Mastery